- Good Morning VietNam
"It is a known fact that men are practical, hardheaded realists, in contrast to women, who are romantic dreamers and actually believe that estrogenic skin cream must do something or they couldn't charge sixteen dollars for that little tiny jar."
- Jane Goodsell
"Airplane travel is nature's way of making you look like you passport photo."
- Al Gore
"I'm not the person your mother warned you about... her imagination isn't that good."
- Amy Gorin
"For some reason a glaze passes over people's faces when you say "Canada". Maybe we should invade South Dakota or something."
- Sandra Gotlieb, wife of the Canadian ambassador to the U.S.
"On a clear day, U.C.L.A."
- Graffiti in San Francisco
"When we ask for advise, we are usually looking for an accomplice."
- Marquis De La Grange
"Life is a sexually transmitted terminal disease."
- Colin Greene
"These people have served a longer sentence than some people who have committed murder."
- Jeff Greenfield, news analyst, describing the jury in the OJ Simpson murder trial, 1995
"I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house."
- Lewis Grizzard
"History repeats itself; historians repeat each other."
- Philip Guedalla
"When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her."
- Sacha Guitry
"Some men rob you with a six-gun -- others with a fountain pen."
- Woodie Guthrie
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